Binders full of women and other reasons to keep Mitt around

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NGKF chosen as exclusive leasing agent for former Pfizer HQ

By Eric Strauss
January 30, 2015 11:27 AM

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Hasbrouck Heights architecture firm secures 3-year NYC pact

By Emily Bader
January 30, 2015 12:21 PM

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Sitar Realty involved in several leases

By Eric Strauss
January 29, 2015 03:34 PM

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KeyBank adds execs to northern N.J. team

By Eric Strauss
January 29, 2015 03:22 PM

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Jersey City digital media company wraps up merger with advertising tech firm

By Eric Strauss
January 29, 2015 10:55 AM

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Logistics company signs lease for South Brunswick distribution center

By Eric Strauss
January 29, 2015 12:00 PM

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Princeton-based drug development company appoints chief scientific officer

By Emily Bader
January 29, 2015 02:45 PM

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I don’t know how I feel about Mitt Romney as a president, but I do love him as a candidate, and I wish he could run every year.

Thanks to the neverending news cycle, which has stations running countdown clocks on the debate and includes CNN offering a live wire on undecided voters, we’ve been subjected to Romney winning the longest game of “Survivor” to get the nomination, and we’ve been treated to so many sound bytes from candidates that are so wooden, you expect them to start shedding leaves in the coming weeks. But Romney really has a gift for waking me from an apathetic haze (which is at least partly the fault of Irish whiskey, I suppose) and laughing along at the punch lines.

I really thought Romney hit a high-water mark in the first debate, when he said he’d fire Big Bird and essentially told Jim Lehrer he was next on the chopping block, even though Lehrer did more to help Romney in that debate than even the professorial, disengaged Barack Obama. But when a Mormon is onstage talking about binders full of women, you know you’ve struck paydirt.

So while I’m not excited about President Romney — although I’m about as thrilled with his opponent — I am really a fan of candidate Romney, especially since he’s reinvented himself so often that he’s on pace to have more patents than Thomas Edison by Election Day. But what would he do in the four — OK, two — years between presidential elections? Here are some ideas, Mitt, in case you lose:

– “X Factor” judge. Not that I really think he’d be a great judge of singing voices, but I would love to hear him interrupt Simon Cowell in mid-diatribe, then insist on having the last word on each performer because someone else got to go first.

– “Sesame Street” character. Don’t you think “Sesame Street” needs a lovable accountant-type figure to bring a sense of morality to young viewers? Like, say all the characters were going to have a surprise party for the letter “P,” and Mitt shows up at the last minute and tells them that, due to budget cuts, not only is the party off, but Elmo and Grover need to share a room and Oscar will have to move out?

– Starbucks barista. There’s something very Romney about being inside a Starbucks — the worldwide corporate giant posing as a mom-and-pop roaster. I think it would be great to have him overhear you complaining about how slow the line is moving, and hear him offer his five-point plan on how to get people their triple shot, no whip, extra dry latte up to five minutes faster without raising taxes.

– Running mate to Chris Christie. The only downfall to this is we would never see a debate between Romney and Joe Biden, which might be a good thing, since such a debate likely would be the mathematic equivalent of dividing by zero.

I’m even more irreverent on Twitter @joe_arney.

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Binders full of women and other reasons to keep Mitt around

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Latest News

NGKF chosen as exclusive leasing agent for former Pfizer HQ

By Eric Strauss
January 30, 2015 11:27 AM

CONTINUE READING

Hasbrouck Heights architecture firm secures 3-year NYC pact

By Emily Bader
January 30, 2015 12:21 PM

CONTINUE READING

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Sitar Realty involved in several leases

By Eric Strauss
January 29, 2015 03:34 PM

CONTINUE READING

KeyBank adds execs to northern N.J. team

By Eric Strauss
January 29, 2015 03:22 PM

CONTINUE READING

Jersey City digital media company wraps up merger with advertising tech firm

By Eric Strauss
January 29, 2015 10:55 AM

CONTINUE READING

Logistics company signs lease for South Brunswick distribution center

By Eric Strauss
January 29, 2015 12:00 PM

CONTINUE READING

Princeton-based drug development company appoints chief scientific officer

By Emily Bader
January 29, 2015 02:45 PM

CONTINUE READING

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I don’t know how I feel about Mitt Romney as a president, but I do love him as a candidate, and I wish he could run every year.

Thanks to the neverending news cycle, which has stations running countdown clocks on the debate and includes CNN offering a live wire on undecided voters, we’ve been subjected to Romney winning the longest game of “Survivor” to get the nomination, and we’ve been treated to so many sound bytes from candidates that are so wooden, you expect them to start shedding leaves in the coming weeks. But Romney really has a gift for waking me from an apathetic haze (which is at least partly the fault of Irish whiskey, I suppose) and laughing along at the punch lines.

I really thought Romney hit a high-water mark in the first debate, when he said he’d fire Big Bird and essentially told Jim Lehrer he was next on the chopping block, even though Lehrer did more to help Romney in that debate than even the professorial, disengaged Barack Obama. But when a Mormon is onstage talking about binders full of women, you know you’ve struck paydirt.

So while I’m not excited about President Romney — although I’m about as thrilled with his opponent — I am really a fan of candidate Romney, especially since he’s reinvented himself so often that he’s on pace to have more patents than Thomas Edison by Election Day. But what would he do in the four — OK, two — years between presidential elections? Here are some ideas, Mitt, in case you lose:

– “X Factor” judge. Not that I really think he’d be a great judge of singing voices, but I would love to hear him interrupt Simon Cowell in mid-diatribe, then insist on having the last word on each performer because someone else got to go first.

– “Sesame Street” character. Don’t you think “Sesame Street” needs a lovable accountant-type figure to bring a sense of morality to young viewers? Like, say all the characters were going to have a surprise party for the letter “P,” and Mitt shows up at the last minute and tells them that, due to budget cuts, not only is the party off, but Elmo and Grover need to share a room and Oscar will have to move out?

– Starbucks barista. There’s something very Romney about being inside a Starbucks — the worldwide corporate giant posing as a mom-and-pop roaster. I think it would be great to have him overhear you complaining about how slow the line is moving, and hear him offer his five-point plan on how to get people their triple shot, no whip, extra dry latte up to five minutes faster without raising taxes.

– Running mate to Chris Christie. The only downfall to this is we would never see a debate between Romney and Joe Biden, which might be a good thing, since such a debate likely would be the mathematic equivalent of dividing by zero.

I’m even more irreverent on Twitter @joe_arney.

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Binders full of women and other reasons to keep Mitt around

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Latest News

NGKF chosen as exclusive leasing agent for former Pfizer HQ

By Eric Strauss
January 30, 2015 11:27 AM

CONTINUE READING

Hasbrouck Heights architecture firm secures 3-year NYC pact

By Emily Bader
January 30, 2015 12:21 PM

CONTINUE READING

advertisement

Sitar Realty involved in several leases

By Eric Strauss
January 29, 2015 03:34 PM

CONTINUE READING

KeyBank adds execs to northern N.J. team

By Eric Strauss
January 29, 2015 03:22 PM

CONTINUE READING

Jersey City digital media company wraps up merger with advertising tech firm

By Eric Strauss
January 29, 2015 10:55 AM

CONTINUE READING

Logistics company signs lease for South Brunswick distribution center

By Eric Strauss
January 29, 2015 12:00 PM

CONTINUE READING

Princeton-based drug development company appoints chief scientific officer

By Emily Bader
January 29, 2015 02:45 PM

CONTINUE READING

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I don’t know how I feel about Mitt Romney as a president, but I do love him as a candidate, and I wish he could run every year.

Thanks to the neverending news cycle, which has stations running countdown clocks on the debate and includes CNN offering a live wire on undecided voters, we’ve been subjected to Romney winning the longest game of “Survivor” to get the nomination, and we’ve been treated to so many sound bytes from candidates that are so wooden, you expect them to start shedding leaves in the coming weeks. But Romney really has a gift for waking me from an apathetic haze (which is at least partly the fault of Irish whiskey, I suppose) and laughing along at the punch lines.

I really thought Romney hit a high-water mark in the first debate, when he said he’d fire Big Bird and essentially told Jim Lehrer he was next on the chopping block, even though Lehrer did more to help Romney in that debate than even the professorial, disengaged Barack Obama. But when a Mormon is onstage talking about binders full of women, you know you’ve struck paydirt.

So while I’m not excited about President Romney — although I’m about as thrilled with his opponent — I am really a fan of candidate Romney, especially since he’s reinvented himself so often that he’s on pace to have more patents than Thomas Edison by Election Day. But what would he do in the four — OK, two — years between presidential elections? Here are some ideas, Mitt, in case you lose:

– “X Factor” judge. Not that I really think he’d be a great judge of singing voices, but I would love to hear him interrupt Simon Cowell in mid-diatribe, then insist on having the last word on each performer because someone else got to go first.

– “Sesame Street” character. Don’t you think “Sesame Street” needs a lovable accountant-type figure to bring a sense of morality to young viewers? Like, say all the characters were going to have a surprise party for the letter “P,” and Mitt shows up at the last minute and tells them that, due to budget cuts, not only is the party off, but Elmo and Grover need to share a room and Oscar will have to move out?

– Starbucks barista. There’s something very Romney about being inside a Starbucks — the worldwide corporate giant posing as a mom-and-pop roaster. I think it would be great to have him overhear you complaining about how slow the line is moving, and hear him offer his five-point plan on how to get people their triple shot, no whip, extra dry latte up to five minutes faster without raising taxes.

– Running mate to Chris Christie. The only downfall to this is we would never see a debate between Romney and Joe Biden, which might be a good thing, since such a debate likely would be the mathematic equivalent of dividing by zero.

I’m even more irreverent on Twitter @joe_arney.

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Binders full of women and other reasons to keep Mitt around

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Latest News

NGKF chosen as exclusive leasing agent for former Pfizer HQ

By Eric Strauss
January 30, 2015 11:27 AM

CONTINUE READING

Hasbrouck Heights architecture firm secures 3-year NYC pact

By Emily Bader
January 30, 2015 12:21 PM

CONTINUE READING

advertisement

Sitar Realty involved in several leases

By Eric Strauss
January 29, 2015 03:34 PM

CONTINUE READING

KeyBank adds execs to northern N.J. team

By Eric Strauss
January 29, 2015 03:22 PM

CONTINUE READING

Jersey City digital media company wraps up merger with advertising tech firm

By Eric Strauss
January 29, 2015 10:55 AM

CONTINUE READING

Logistics company signs lease for South Brunswick distribution center

By Eric Strauss
January 29, 2015 12:00 PM

CONTINUE READING

Princeton-based drug development company appoints chief scientific officer

By Emily Bader
January 29, 2015 02:45 PM

CONTINUE READING

advertisement

I don’t know how I feel about Mitt Romney as a president, but I do love him as a candidate, and I wish he could run every year.

Thanks to the neverending news cycle, which has stations running countdown clocks on the debate and includes CNN offering a live wire on undecided voters, we’ve been subjected to Romney winning the longest game of “Survivor” to get the nomination, and we’ve been treated to so many sound bytes from candidates that are so wooden, you expect them to start shedding leaves in the coming weeks. But Romney really has a gift for waking me from an apathetic haze (which is at least partly the fault of Irish whiskey, I suppose) and laughing along at the punch lines.

I really thought Romney hit a high-water mark in the first debate, when he said he’d fire Big Bird and essentially told Jim Lehrer he was next on the chopping block, even though Lehrer did more to help Romney in that debate than even the professorial, disengaged Barack Obama. But when a Mormon is onstage talking about binders full of women, you know you’ve struck paydirt.

So while I’m not excited about President Romney — although I’m about as thrilled with his opponent — I am really a fan of candidate Romney, especially since he’s reinvented himself so often that he’s on pace to have more patents than Thomas Edison by Election Day. But what would he do in the four — OK, two — years between presidential elections? Here are some ideas, Mitt, in case you lose:

– “X Factor” judge. Not that I really think he’d be a great judge of singing voices, but I would love to hear him interrupt Simon Cowell in mid-diatribe, then insist on having the last word on each performer because someone else got to go first.

– “Sesame Street” character. Don’t you think “Sesame Street” needs a lovable accountant-type figure to bring a sense of morality to young viewers? Like, say all the characters were going to have a surprise party for the letter “P,” and Mitt shows up at the last minute and tells them that, due to budget cuts, not only is the party off, but Elmo and Grover need to share a room and Oscar will have to move out?

– Starbucks barista. There’s something very Romney about being inside a Starbucks — the worldwide corporate giant posing as a mom-and-pop roaster. I think it would be great to have him overhear you complaining about how slow the line is moving, and hear him offer his five-point plan on how to get people their triple shot, no whip, extra dry latte up to five minutes faster without raising taxes.

– Running mate to Chris Christie. The only downfall to this is we would never see a debate between Romney and Joe Biden, which might be a good thing, since such a debate likely would be the mathematic equivalent of dividing by zero.

I’m even more irreverent on Twitter @joe_arney.

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Binders full of women and other reasons to keep Mitt around

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Latest News

NGKF chosen as exclusive leasing agent for former Pfizer HQ

By Eric Strauss
January 30, 2015 11:27 AM

CONTINUE READING

Hasbrouck Heights architecture firm secures 3-year NYC pact

By Emily Bader
January 30, 2015 12:21 PM

CONTINUE READING

advertisement

Sitar Realty involved in several leases

By Eric Strauss
January 29, 2015 03:34 PM

CONTINUE READING

KeyBank adds execs to northern N.J. team

By Eric Strauss
January 29, 2015 03:22 PM

CONTINUE READING

Jersey City digital media company wraps up merger with advertising tech firm

By Eric Strauss
January 29, 2015 10:55 AM

CONTINUE READING

Logistics company signs lease for South Brunswick distribution center

By Eric Strauss
January 29, 2015 12:00 PM

CONTINUE READING

Princeton-based drug development company appoints chief scientific officer

By Emily Bader
January 29, 2015 02:45 PM

CONTINUE READING

advertisement

I don’t know how I feel about Mitt Romney as a president, but I do love him as a candidate, and I wish he could run every year.

Thanks to the neverending news cycle, which has stations running countdown clocks on the debate and includes CNN offering a live wire on undecided voters, we’ve been subjected to Romney winning the longest game of “Survivor” to get the nomination, and we’ve been treated to so many sound bytes from candidates that are so wooden, you expect them to start shedding leaves in the coming weeks. But Romney really has a gift for waking me from an apathetic haze (which is at least partly the fault of Irish whiskey, I suppose) and laughing along at the punch lines.

I really thought Romney hit a high-water mark in the first debate, when he said he’d fire Big Bird and essentially told Jim Lehrer he was next on the chopping block, even though Lehrer did more to help Romney in that debate than even the professorial, disengaged Barack Obama. But when a Mormon is onstage talking about binders full of women, you know you’ve struck paydirt.

So while I’m not excited about President Romney — although I’m about as thrilled with his opponent — I am really a fan of candidate Romney, especially since he’s reinvented himself so often that he’s on pace to have more patents than Thomas Edison by Election Day. But what would he do in the four — OK, two — years between presidential elections? Here are some ideas, Mitt, in case you lose:

– “X Factor” judge. Not that I really think he’d be a great judge of singing voices, but I would love to hear him interrupt Simon Cowell in mid-diatribe, then insist on having the last word on each performer because someone else got to go first.

– “Sesame Street” character. Don’t you think “Sesame Street” needs a lovable accountant-type figure to bring a sense of morality to young viewers? Like, say all the characters were going to have a surprise party for the letter “P,” and Mitt shows up at the last minute and tells them that, due to budget cuts, not only is the party off, but Elmo and Grover need to share a room and Oscar will have to move out?

– Starbucks barista. There’s something very Romney about being inside a Starbucks — the worldwide corporate giant posing as a mom-and-pop roaster. I think it would be great to have him overhear you complaining about how slow the line is moving, and hear him offer his five-point plan on how to get people their triple shot, no whip, extra dry latte up to five minutes faster without raising taxes.

– Running mate to Chris Christie. The only downfall to this is we would never see a debate between Romney and Joe Biden, which might be a good thing, since such a debate likely would be the mathematic equivalent of dividing by zero.

I’m even more irreverent on Twitter @joe_arney.

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Binders full of women and other reasons to keep Mitt around

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Latest News

NGKF chosen as exclusive leasing agent for former Pfizer HQ

By Eric Strauss
January 30, 2015 11:27 AM

CONTINUE READING

Hasbrouck Heights architecture firm secures 3-year NYC pact

By Emily Bader
January 30, 2015 12:21 PM

CONTINUE READING

advertisement

Sitar Realty involved in several leases

By Eric Strauss
January 29, 2015 03:34 PM

CONTINUE READING

KeyBank adds execs to northern N.J. team

By Eric Strauss
January 29, 2015 03:22 PM

CONTINUE READING

Jersey City digital media company wraps up merger with advertising tech firm

By Eric Strauss
January 29, 2015 10:55 AM

CONTINUE READING

Logistics company signs lease for South Brunswick distribution center

By Eric Strauss
January 29, 2015 12:00 PM

CONTINUE READING

Princeton-based drug development company appoints chief scientific officer

By Emily Bader
January 29, 2015 02:45 PM

CONTINUE READING

advertisement

I don’t know how I feel about Mitt Romney as a president, but I do love him as a candidate, and I wish he could run every year.

Thanks to the neverending news cycle, which has stations running countdown clocks on the debate and includes CNN offering a live wire on undecided voters, we’ve been subjected to Romney winning the longest game of “Survivor” to get the nomination, and we’ve been treated to so many sound bytes from candidates that are so wooden, you expect them to start shedding leaves in the coming weeks. But Romney really has a gift for waking me from an apathetic haze (which is at least partly the fault of Irish whiskey, I suppose) and laughing along at the punch lines.

I really thought Romney hit a high-water mark in the first debate, when he said he’d fire Big Bird and essentially told Jim Lehrer he was next on the chopping block, even though Lehrer did more to help Romney in that debate than even the professorial, disengaged Barack Obama. But when a Mormon is onstage talking about binders full of women, you know you’ve struck paydirt.

So while I’m not excited about President Romney — although I’m about as thrilled with his opponent — I am really a fan of candidate Romney, especially since he’s reinvented himself so often that he’s on pace to have more patents than Thomas Edison by Election Day. But what would he do in the four — OK, two — years between presidential elections? Here are some ideas, Mitt, in case you lose:

– “X Factor” judge. Not that I really think he’d be a great judge of singing voices, but I would love to hear him interrupt Simon Cowell in mid-diatribe, then insist on having the last word on each performer because someone else got to go first.

– “Sesame Street” character. Don’t you think “Sesame Street” needs a lovable accountant-type figure to bring a sense of morality to young viewers? Like, say all the characters were going to have a surprise party for the letter “P,” and Mitt shows up at the last minute and tells them that, due to budget cuts, not only is the party off, but Elmo and Grover need to share a room and Oscar will have to move out?

– Starbucks barista. There’s something very Romney about being inside a Starbucks — the worldwide corporate giant posing as a mom-and-pop roaster. I think it would be great to have him overhear you complaining about how slow the line is moving, and hear him offer his five-point plan on how to get people their triple shot, no whip, extra dry latte up to five minutes faster without raising taxes.

– Running mate to Chris Christie. The only downfall to this is we would never see a debate between Romney and Joe Biden, which might be a good thing, since such a debate likely would be the mathematic equivalent of dividing by zero.

I’m even more irreverent on Twitter @joe_arney.

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Binders full of women and other reasons to keep Mitt around

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Latest News

NGKF chosen as exclusive leasing agent for former Pfizer HQ

By Eric Strauss
January 30, 2015 11:27 AM

CONTINUE READING

Hasbrouck Heights architecture firm secures 3-year NYC pact

By Emily Bader
January 30, 2015 12:21 PM

CONTINUE READING

advertisement

Sitar Realty involved in several leases

By Eric Strauss
January 29, 2015 03:34 PM

CONTINUE READING

KeyBank adds execs to northern N.J. team

By Eric Strauss
January 29, 2015 03:22 PM

CONTINUE READING

Jersey City digital media company wraps up merger with advertising tech firm

By Eric Strauss
January 29, 2015 10:55 AM

CONTINUE READING

Logistics company signs lease for South Brunswick distribution center

By Eric Strauss
January 29, 2015 12:00 PM

CONTINUE READING

Princeton-based drug development company appoints chief scientific officer

By Emily Bader
January 29, 2015 02:45 PM

CONTINUE READING

advertisement

I don’t know how I feel about Mitt Romney as a president, but I do love him as a candidate, and I wish he could run every year.

Thanks to the neverending news cycle, which has stations running countdown clocks on the debate and includes CNN offering a live wire on undecided voters, we’ve been subjected to Romney winning the longest game of “Survivor” to get the nomination, and we’ve been treated to so many sound bytes from candidates that are so wooden, you expect them to start shedding leaves in the coming weeks. But Romney really has a gift for waking me from an apathetic haze (which is at least partly the fault of Irish whiskey, I suppose) and laughing along at the punch lines.

I really thought Romney hit a high-water mark in the first debate, when he said he’d fire Big Bird and essentially told Jim Lehrer he was next on the chopping block, even though Lehrer did more to help Romney in that debate than even the professorial, disengaged Barack Obama. But when a Mormon is onstage talking about binders full of women, you know you’ve struck paydirt.

So while I’m not excited about President Romney — although I’m about as thrilled with his opponent — I am really a fan of candidate Romney, especially since he’s reinvented himself so often that he’s on pace to have more patents than Thomas Edison by Election Day. But what would he do in the four — OK, two — years between presidential elections? Here are some ideas, Mitt, in case you lose:

– “X Factor” judge. Not that I really think he’d be a great judge of singing voices, but I would love to hear him interrupt Simon Cowell in mid-diatribe, then insist on having the last word on each performer because someone else got to go first.

– “Sesame Street” character. Don’t you think “Sesame Street” needs a lovable accountant-type figure to bring a sense of morality to young viewers? Like, say all the characters were going to have a surprise party for the letter “P,” and Mitt shows up at the last minute and tells them that, due to budget cuts, not only is the party off, but Elmo and Grover need to share a room and Oscar will have to move out?

– Starbucks barista. There’s something very Romney about being inside a Starbucks — the worldwide corporate giant posing as a mom-and-pop roaster. I think it would be great to have him overhear you complaining about how slow the line is moving, and hear him offer his five-point plan on how to get people their triple shot, no whip, extra dry latte up to five minutes faster without raising taxes.

– Running mate to Chris Christie. The only downfall to this is we would never see a debate between Romney and Joe Biden, which might be a good thing, since such a debate likely would be the mathematic equivalent of dividing by zero.

I’m even more irreverent on Twitter @joe_arney.

Share This Story On:

Binders full of women and other reasons to keep Mitt around

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Latest News

NGKF chosen as exclusive leasing agent for former Pfizer HQ

By Eric Strauss
January 30, 2015 11:27 AM

CONTINUE READING

Hasbrouck Heights architecture firm secures 3-year NYC pact

By Emily Bader
January 30, 2015 12:21 PM

CONTINUE READING

advertisement

Sitar Realty involved in several leases

By Eric Strauss
January 29, 2015 03:34 PM

CONTINUE READING

KeyBank adds execs to northern N.J. team

By Eric Strauss
January 29, 2015 03:22 PM

CONTINUE READING

Jersey City digital media company wraps up merger with advertising tech firm

By Eric Strauss
January 29, 2015 10:55 AM

CONTINUE READING

Logistics company signs lease for South Brunswick distribution center

By Eric Strauss
January 29, 2015 12:00 PM

CONTINUE READING

Princeton-based drug development company appoints chief scientific officer

By Emily Bader
January 29, 2015 02:45 PM

CONTINUE READING

advertisement

I don’t know how I feel about Mitt Romney as a president, but I do love him as a candidate, and I wish he could run every year.

Thanks to the neverending news cycle, which has stations running countdown clocks on the debate and includes CNN offering a live wire on undecided voters, we’ve been subjected to Romney winning the longest game of “Survivor” to get the nomination, and we’ve been treated to so many sound bytes from candidates that are so wooden, you expect them to start shedding leaves in the coming weeks. But Romney really has a gift for waking me from an apathetic haze (which is at least partly the fault of Irish whiskey, I suppose) and laughing along at the punch lines.

I really thought Romney hit a high-water mark in the first debate, when he said he’d fire Big Bird and essentially told Jim Lehrer he was next on the chopping block, even though Lehrer did more to help Romney in that debate than even the professorial, disengaged Barack Obama. But when a Mormon is onstage talking about binders full of women, you know you’ve struck paydirt.

So while I’m not excited about President Romney — although I’m about as thrilled with his opponent — I am really a fan of candidate Romney, especially since he’s reinvented himself so often that he’s on pace to have more patents than Thomas Edison by Election Day. But what would he do in the four — OK, two — years between presidential elections? Here are some ideas, Mitt, in case you lose:

– “X Factor” judge. Not that I really think he’d be a great judge of singing voices, but I would love to hear him interrupt Simon Cowell in mid-diatribe, then insist on having the last word on each performer because someone else got to go first.

– “Sesame Street” character. Don’t you think “Sesame Street” needs a lovable accountant-type figure to bring a sense of morality to young viewers? Like, say all the characters were going to have a surprise party for the letter “P,” and Mitt shows up at the last minute and tells them that, due to budget cuts, not only is the party off, but Elmo and Grover need to share a room and Oscar will have to move out?

– Starbucks barista. There’s something very Romney about being inside a Starbucks — the worldwide corporate giant posing as a mom-and-pop roaster. I think it would be great to have him overhear you complaining about how slow the line is moving, and hear him offer his five-point plan on how to get people their triple shot, no whip, extra dry latte up to five minutes faster without raising taxes.

– Running mate to Chris Christie. The only downfall to this is we would never see a debate between Romney and Joe Biden, which might be a good thing, since such a debate likely would be the mathematic equivalent of dividing by zero.

I’m even more irreverent on Twitter @joe_arney.

Share This Story On:

Binders full of women and other reasons to keep Mitt around

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Latest News

NGKF chosen as exclusive leasing agent for former Pfizer HQ

By Eric Strauss
January 30, 2015 11:27 AM

CONTINUE READING

Hasbrouck Heights architecture firm secures 3-year NYC pact

By Emily Bader
January 30, 2015 12:21 PM

CONTINUE READING

advertisement

Sitar Realty involved in several leases

By Eric Strauss
January 29, 2015 03:34 PM

CONTINUE READING

KeyBank adds execs to northern N.J. team

By Eric Strauss
January 29, 2015 03:22 PM

CONTINUE READING

Jersey City digital media company wraps up merger with advertising tech firm

By Eric Strauss
January 29, 2015 10:55 AM

CONTINUE READING

Logistics company signs lease for South Brunswick distribution center

By Eric Strauss
January 29, 2015 12:00 PM

CONTINUE READING

Princeton-based drug development company appoints chief scientific officer

By Emily Bader
January 29, 2015 02:45 PM

CONTINUE READING

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I don’t know how I feel about Mitt Romney as a president, but I do love him as a candidate, and I wish he could run every year.

Thanks to the neverending news cycle, which has stations running countdown clocks on the debate and includes CNN offering a live wire on undecided voters, we’ve been subjected to Romney winning the longest game of “Survivor” to get the nomination, and we’ve been treated to so many sound bytes from candidates that are so wooden, you expect them to start shedding leaves in the coming weeks. But Romney really has a gift for waking me from an apathetic haze (which is at least partly the fault of Irish whiskey, I suppose) and laughing along at the punch lines.

I really thought Romney hit a high-water mark in the first debate, when he said he’d fire Big Bird and essentially told Jim Lehrer he was next on the chopping block, even though Lehrer did more to help Romney in that debate than even the professorial, disengaged Barack Obama. But when a Mormon is onstage talking about binders full of women, you know you’ve struck paydirt.

So while I’m not excited about President Romney — although I’m about as thrilled with his opponent — I am really a fan of candidate Romney, especially since he’s reinvented himself so often that he’s on pace to have more patents than Thomas Edison by Election Day. But what would he do in the four — OK, two — years between presidential elections? Here are some ideas, Mitt, in case you lose:

– “X Factor” judge. Not that I really think he’d be a great judge of singing voices, but I would love to hear him interrupt Simon Cowell in mid-diatribe, then insist on having the last word on each performer because someone else got to go first.

– “Sesame Street” character. Don’t you think “Sesame Street” needs a lovable accountant-type figure to bring a sense of morality to young viewers? Like, say all the characters were going to have a surprise party for the letter “P,” and Mitt shows up at the last minute and tells them that, due to budget cuts, not only is the party off, but Elmo and Grover need to share a room and Oscar will have to move out?

– Starbucks barista. There’s something very Romney about being inside a Starbucks — the worldwide corporate giant posing as a mom-and-pop roaster. I think it would be great to have him overhear you complaining about how slow the line is moving, and hear him offer his five-point plan on how to get people their triple shot, no whip, extra dry latte up to five minutes faster without raising taxes.

– Running mate to Chris Christie. The only downfall to this is we would never see a debate between Romney and Joe Biden, which might be a good thing, since such a debate likely would be the mathematic equivalent of dividing by zero.

I’m even more irreverent on Twitter @joe_arney.

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I don’t know how I feel about Mitt Romney as a president, but I do love him as a candidate, and I wish he could run every year.

Thanks to the neverending news cycle, which has stations running countdown clocks on the debate and includes CNN offering a live wire on undecided voters, we’ve been subjected to Romney winning the longest game of “Survivor” to get the nomination, and we’ve been treated to so many sound bytes from candidates that are so wooden, you expect them to start shedding leaves in the coming weeks. But Romney really has a gift for waking me from an apathetic haze (which is at least partly the fault of Irish whiskey, I suppose) and laughing along at the punch lines.

I really thought Romney hit a high-water mark in the first debate, when he said he’d fire Big Bird and essentially told Jim Lehrer he was next on the chopping block, even though Lehrer did more to help Romney in that debate than even the professorial, disengaged Barack Obama. But when a Mormon is onstage talking about binders full of women, you know you’ve struck paydirt.

So while I’m not excited about President Romney — although I’m about as thrilled with his opponent — I am really a fan of candidate Romney, especially since he’s reinvented himself so often that he’s on pace to have more patents than Thomas Edison by Election Day. But what would he do in the four — OK, two — years between presidential elections? Here are some ideas, Mitt, in case you lose:

– “X Factor” judge. Not that I really think he’d be a great judge of singing voices, but I would love to hear him interrupt Simon Cowell in mid-diatribe, then insist on having the last word on each performer because someone else got to go first.

– “Sesame Street” character. Don’t you think “Sesame Street” needs a lovable accountant-type figure to bring a sense of morality to young viewers? Like, say all the characters were going to have a surprise party for the letter “P,” and Mitt shows up at the last minute and tells them that, due to budget cuts, not only is the party off, but Elmo and Grover need to share a room and Oscar will have to move out?

– Starbucks barista. There’s something very Romney about being inside a Starbucks — the worldwide corporate giant posing as a mom-and-pop roaster. I think it would be great to have him overhear you complaining about how slow the line is moving, and hear him offer his five-point plan on how to get people their triple shot, no whip, extra dry latte up to five minutes faster without raising taxes.

– Running mate to Chris Christie. The only downfall to this is we would never see a debate between Romney and Joe Biden, which might be a good thing, since such a debate likely would be the mathematic equivalent of dividing by zero.

I’m even more irreverent on Twitter @joe_arney.

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I don’t know how I feel about Mitt Romney as a president, but I do love him as a candidate, and I wish he could run every year.

Thanks to the neverending news cycle, which has stations running countdown clocks on the debate and includes CNN offering a live wire on undecided voters, we’ve been subjected to Romney winning the longest game of “Survivor” to get the nomination, and we’ve been treated to so many sound bytes from candidates that are so wooden, you expect them to start shedding leaves in the coming weeks. But Romney really has a gift for waking me from an apathetic haze (which is at least partly the fault of Irish whiskey, I suppose) and laughing along at the punch lines.

I really thought Romney hit a high-water mark in the first debate, when he said he’d fire Big Bird and essentially told Jim Lehrer he was next on the chopping block, even though Lehrer did more to help Romney in that debate than even the professorial, disengaged Barack Obama. But when a Mormon is onstage talking about binders full of women, you know you’ve struck paydirt.

So while I’m not excited about President Romney — although I’m about as thrilled with his opponent — I am really a fan of candidate Romney, especially since he’s reinvented himself so often that he’s on pace to have more patents than Thomas Edison by Election Day. But what would he do in the four — OK, two — years between presidential elections? Here are some ideas, Mitt, in case you lose:

– “X Factor” judge. Not that I really think he’d be a great judge of singing voices, but I would love to hear him interrupt Simon Cowell in mid-diatribe, then insist on having the last word on each performer because someone else got to go first.

– “Sesame Street” character. Don’t you think “Sesame Street” needs a lovable accountant-type figure to bring a sense of morality to young viewers? Like, say all the characters were going to have a surprise party for the letter “P,” and Mitt shows up at the last minute and tells them that, due to budget cuts, not only is the party off, but Elmo and Grover need to share a room and Oscar will have to move out?

– Starbucks barista. There’s something very Romney about being inside a Starbucks — the worldwide corporate giant posing as a mom-and-pop roaster. I think it would be great to have him overhear you complaining about how slow the line is moving, and hear him offer his five-point plan on how to get people their triple shot, no whip, extra dry latte up to five minutes faster without raising taxes.

– Running mate to Chris Christie. The only downfall to this is we would never see a debate between Romney and Joe Biden, which might be a good thing, since such a debate likely would be the mathematic equivalent of dividing by zero.

I’m even more irreverent on Twitter @joe_arney.

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By Eric Strauss
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Princeton-based drug development company appoints chief scientific officer

By Emily Bader
January 29, 2015 02:45 PM

CONTINUE READING

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I don’t know how I feel about Mitt Romney as a president, but I do love him as a candidate, and I wish he could run every year.

Thanks to the neverending news cycle, which has stations running countdown clocks on the debate and includes CNN offering a live wire on undecided voters, we’ve been subjected to Romney winning the longest game of “Survivor” to get the nomination, and we’ve been treated to so many sound bytes from candidates that are so wooden, you expect them to start shedding leaves in the coming weeks. But Romney really has a gift for waking me from an apathetic haze (which is at least partly the fault of Irish whiskey, I suppose) and laughing along at the punch lines.

I really thought Romney hit a high-water mark in the first debate, when he said he’d fire Big Bird and essentially told Jim Lehrer he was next on the chopping block, even though Lehrer did more to help Romney in that debate than even the professorial, disengaged Barack Obama. But when a Mormon is onstage talking about binders full of women, you know you’ve struck paydirt.

So while I’m not excited about President Romney — although I’m about as thrilled with his opponent — I am really a fan of candidate Romney, especially since he’s reinvented himself so often that he’s on pace to have more patents than Thomas Edison by Election Day. But what would he do in the four — OK, two — years between presidential elections? Here are some ideas, Mitt, in case you lose:

– “X Factor” judge. Not that I really think he’d be a great judge of singing voices, but I would love to hear him interrupt Simon Cowell in mid-diatribe, then insist on having the last word on each performer because someone else got to go first.

– “Sesame Street” character. Don’t you think “Sesame Street” needs a lovable accountant-type figure to bring a sense of morality to young viewers? Like, say all the characters were going to have a surprise party for the letter “P,” and Mitt shows up at the last minute and tells them that, due to budget cuts, not only is the party off, but Elmo and Grover need to share a room and Oscar will have to move out?

– Starbucks barista. There’s something very Romney about being inside a Starbucks — the worldwide corporate giant posing as a mom-and-pop roaster. I think it would be great to have him overhear you complaining about how slow the line is moving, and hear him offer his five-point plan on how to get people their triple shot, no whip, extra dry latte up to five minutes faster without raising taxes.

– Running mate to Chris Christie. The only downfall to this is we would never see a debate between Romney and Joe Biden, which might be a good thing, since such a debate likely would be the mathematic equivalent of dividing by zero.

I’m even more irreverent on Twitter @joe_arney.

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Latest News

NGKF chosen as exclusive leasing agent for former Pfizer HQ

By Eric Strauss
January 30, 2015 11:27 AM

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Hasbrouck Heights architecture firm secures 3-year NYC pact

By Emily Bader
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CONTINUE READING

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CONTINUE READING

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By Eric Strauss
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CONTINUE READING

Princeton-based drug development company appoints chief scientific officer

By Emily Bader
January 29, 2015 02:45 PM

CONTINUE READING

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I don’t know how I feel about Mitt Romney as a president, but I do love him as a candidate, and I wish he could run every year.

Thanks to the neverending news cycle, which has stations running countdown clocks on the debate and includes CNN offering a live wire on undecided voters, we’ve been subjected to Romney winning the longest game of “Survivor” to get the nomination, and we’ve been treated to so many sound bytes from candidates that are so wooden, you expect them to start shedding leaves in the coming weeks. But Romney really has a gift for waking me from an apathetic haze (which is at least partly the fault of Irish whiskey, I suppose) and laughing along at the punch lines.

I really thought Romney hit a high-water mark in the first debate, when he said he’d fire Big Bird and essentially told Jim Lehrer he was next on the chopping block, even though Lehrer did more to help Romney in that debate than even the professorial, disengaged Barack Obama. But when a Mormon is onstage talking about binders full of women, you know you’ve struck paydirt.

So while I’m not excited about President Romney — although I’m about as thrilled with his opponent — I am really a fan of candidate Romney, especially since he’s reinvented himself so often that he’s on pace to have more patents than Thomas Edison by Election Day. But what would he do in the four — OK, two — years between presidential elections? Here are some ideas, Mitt, in case you lose:

– “X Factor” judge. Not that I really think he’d be a great judge of singing voices, but I would love to hear him interrupt Simon Cowell in mid-diatribe, then insist on having the last word on each performer because someone else got to go first.

– “Sesame Street” character. Don’t you think “Sesame Street” needs a lovable accountant-type figure to bring a sense of morality to young viewers? Like, say all the characters were going to have a surprise party for the letter “P,” and Mitt shows up at the last minute and tells them that, due to budget cuts, not only is the party off, but Elmo and Grover need to share a room and Oscar will have to move out?

– Starbucks barista. There’s something very Romney about being inside a Starbucks — the worldwide corporate giant posing as a mom-and-pop roaster. I think it would be great to have him overhear you complaining about how slow the line is moving, and hear him offer his five-point plan on how to get people their triple shot, no whip, extra dry latte up to five minutes faster without raising taxes.

– Running mate to Chris Christie. The only downfall to this is we would never see a debate between Romney and Joe Biden, which might be a good thing, since such a debate likely would be the mathematic equivalent of dividing by zero.

I’m even more irreverent on Twitter @joe_arney.

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By Eric Strauss
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CONTINUE READING

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CONTINUE READING

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I don’t know how I feel about Mitt Romney as a president, but I do love him as a candidate, and I wish he could run every year.

Thanks to the neverending news cycle, which has stations running countdown clocks on the debate and includes CNN offering a live wire on undecided voters, we’ve been subjected to Romney winning the longest game of “Survivor” to get the nomination, and we’ve been treated to so many sound bytes from candidates that are so wooden, you expect them to start shedding leaves in the coming weeks. But Romney really has a gift for waking me from an apathetic haze (which is at least partly the fault of Irish whiskey, I suppose) and laughing along at the punch lines.

I really thought Romney hit a high-water mark in the first debate, when he said he’d fire Big Bird and essentially told Jim Lehrer he was next on the chopping block, even though Lehrer did more to help Romney in that debate than even the professorial, disengaged Barack Obama. But when a Mormon is onstage talking about binders full of women, you know you’ve struck paydirt.

So while I’m not excited about President Romney — although I’m about as thrilled with his opponent — I am really a fan of candidate Romney, especially since he’s reinvented himself so often that he’s on pace to have more patents than Thomas Edison by Election Day. But what would he do in the four — OK, two — years between presidential elections? Here are some ideas, Mitt, in case you lose:

– “X Factor” judge. Not that I really think he’d be a great judge of singing voices, but I would love to hear him interrupt Simon Cowell in mid-diatribe, then insist on having the last word on each performer because someone else got to go first.

– “Sesame Street” character. Don’t you think “Sesame Street” needs a lovable accountant-type figure to bring a sense of morality to young viewers? Like, say all the characters were going to have a surprise party for the letter “P,” and Mitt shows up at the last minute and tells them that, due to budget cuts, not only is the party off, but Elmo and Grover need to share a room and Oscar will have to move out?

– Starbucks barista. There’s something very Romney about being inside a Starbucks — the worldwide corporate giant posing as a mom-and-pop roaster. I think it would be great to have him overhear you complaining about how slow the line is moving, and hear him offer his five-point plan on how to get people their triple shot, no whip, extra dry latte up to five minutes faster without raising taxes.

– Running mate to Chris Christie. The only downfall to this is we would never see a debate between Romney and Joe Biden, which might be a good thing, since such a debate likely would be the mathematic equivalent of dividing by zero.

I’m even more irreverent on Twitter @joe_arney.

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By Eric Strauss
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CONTINUE READING

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I don’t know how I feel about Mitt Romney as a president, but I do love him as a candidate, and I wish he could run every year.

Thanks to the neverending news cycle, which has stations running countdown clocks on the debate and includes CNN offering a live wire on undecided voters, we’ve been subjected to Romney winning the longest game of “Survivor” to get the nomination, and we’ve been treated to so many sound bytes from candidates that are so wooden, you expect them to start shedding leaves in the coming weeks. But Romney really has a gift for waking me from an apathetic haze (which is at least partly the fault of Irish whiskey, I suppose) and laughing along at the punch lines.

I really thought Romney hit a high-water mark in the first debate, when he said he’d fire Big Bird and essentially told Jim Lehrer he was next on the chopping block, even though Lehrer did more to help Romney in that debate than even the professorial, disengaged Barack Obama. But when a Mormon is onstage talking about binders full of women, you know you’ve struck paydirt.

So while I’m not excited about President Romney — although I’m about as thrilled with his opponent — I am really a fan of candidate Romney, especially since he’s reinvented himself so often that he’s on pace to have more patents than Thomas Edison by Election Day. But what would he do in the four — OK, two — years between presidential elections? Here are some ideas, Mitt, in case you lose:

– “X Factor” judge. Not that I really think he’d be a great judge of singing voices, but I would love to hear him interrupt Simon Cowell in mid-diatribe, then insist on having the last word on each performer because someone else got to go first.

– “Sesame Street” character. Don’t you think “Sesame Street” needs a lovable accountant-type figure to bring a sense of morality to young viewers? Like, say all the characters were going to have a surprise party for the letter “P,” and Mitt shows up at the last minute and tells them that, due to budget cuts, not only is the party off, but Elmo and Grover need to share a room and Oscar will have to move out?

– Starbucks barista. There’s something very Romney about being inside a Starbucks — the worldwide corporate giant posing as a mom-and-pop roaster. I think it would be great to have him overhear you complaining about how slow the line is moving, and hear him offer his five-point plan on how to get people their triple shot, no whip, extra dry latte up to five minutes faster without raising taxes.

– Running mate to Chris Christie. The only downfall to this is we would never see a debate between Romney and Joe Biden, which might be a good thing, since such a debate likely would be the mathematic equivalent of dividing by zero.

I’m even more irreverent on Twitter @joe_arney.

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Binders full of women and other reasons to keep Mitt around

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Latest News

NGKF chosen as exclusive leasing agent for former Pfizer HQ

By Eric Strauss
January 30, 2015 11:27 AM

CONTINUE READING

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CONTINUE READING

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CONTINUE READING

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CONTINUE READING

Princeton-based drug development company appoints chief scientific officer

By Emily Bader
January 29, 2015 02:45 PM

CONTINUE READING

advertisement

I don’t know how I feel about Mitt Romney as a president, but I do love him as a candidate, and I wish he could run every year.

Thanks to the neverending news cycle, which has stations running countdown clocks on the debate and includes CNN offering a live wire on undecided voters, we’ve been subjected to Romney winning the longest game of “Survivor” to get the nomination, and we’ve been treated to so many sound bytes from candidates that are so wooden, you expect them to start shedding leaves in the coming weeks. But Romney really has a gift for waking me from an apathetic haze (which is at least partly the fault of Irish whiskey, I suppose) and laughing along at the punch lines.

I really thought Romney hit a high-water mark in the first debate, when he said he’d fire Big Bird and essentially told Jim Lehrer he was next on the chopping block, even though Lehrer did more to help Romney in that debate than even the professorial, disengaged Barack Obama. But when a Mormon is onstage talking about binders full of women, you know you’ve struck paydirt.

So while I’m not excited about President Romney — although I’m about as thrilled with his opponent — I am really a fan of candidate Romney, especially since he’s reinvented himself so often that he’s on pace to have more patents than Thomas Edison by Election Day. But what would he do in the four — OK, two — years between presidential elections? Here are some ideas, Mitt, in case you lose:

– “X Factor” judge. Not that I really think he’d be a great judge of singing voices, but I would love to hear him interrupt Simon Cowell in mid-diatribe, then insist on having the last word on each performer because someone else got to go first.

– “Sesame Street” character. Don’t you think “Sesame Street” needs a lovable accountant-type figure to bring a sense of morality to young viewers? Like, say all the characters were going to have a surprise party for the letter “P,” and Mitt shows up at the last minute and tells them that, due to budget cuts, not only is the party off, but Elmo and Grover need to share a room and Oscar will have to move out?

– Starbucks barista. There’s something very Romney about being inside a Starbucks — the worldwide corporate giant posing as a mom-and-pop roaster. I think it would be great to have him overhear you complaining about how slow the line is moving, and hear him offer his five-point plan on how to get people their triple shot, no whip, extra dry latte up to five minutes faster without raising taxes.

– Running mate to Chris Christie. The only downfall to this is we would never see a debate between Romney and Joe Biden, which might be a good thing, since such a debate likely would be the mathematic equivalent of dividing by zero.

I’m even more irreverent on Twitter @joe_arney.

Share This Story On:

Binders full of women and other reasons to keep Mitt around

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Latest News

NGKF chosen as exclusive leasing agent for former Pfizer HQ

By Eric Strauss
January 30, 2015 11:27 AM

CONTINUE READING

Hasbrouck Heights architecture firm secures 3-year NYC pact

By Emily Bader
January 30, 2015 12:21 PM

CONTINUE READING

advertisement

Sitar Realty involved in several leases

By Eric Strauss
January 29, 2015 03:34 PM

CONTINUE READING

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By Eric Strauss
January 29, 2015 03:22 PM

CONTINUE READING

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By Eric Strauss
January 29, 2015 10:55 AM

CONTINUE READING

Logistics company signs lease for South Brunswick distribution center

By Eric Strauss
January 29, 2015 12:00 PM

CONTINUE READING

Princeton-based drug development company appoints chief scientific officer

By Emily Bader
January 29, 2015 02:45 PM

CONTINUE READING

advertisement

I don’t know how I feel about Mitt Romney as a president, but I do love him as a candidate, and I wish he could run every year.

Thanks to the neverending news cycle, which has stations running countdown clocks on the debate and includes CNN offering a live wire on undecided voters, we’ve been subjected to Romney winning the longest game of “Survivor” to get the nomination, and we’ve been treated to so many sound bytes from candidates that are so wooden, you expect them to start shedding leaves in the coming weeks. But Romney really has a gift for waking me from an apathetic haze (which is at least partly the fault of Irish whiskey, I suppose) and laughing along at the punch lines.

I really thought Romney hit a high-water mark in the first debate, when he said he’d fire Big Bird and essentially told Jim Lehrer he was next on the chopping block, even though Lehrer did more to help Romney in that debate than even the professorial, disengaged Barack Obama. But when a Mormon is onstage talking about binders full of women, you know you’ve struck paydirt.

So while I’m not excited about President Romney — although I’m about as thrilled with his opponent — I am really a fan of candidate Romney, especially since he’s reinvented himself so often that he’s on pace to have more patents than Thomas Edison by Election Day. But what would he do in the four — OK, two — years between presidential elections? Here are some ideas, Mitt, in case you lose:

– “X Factor” judge. Not that I really think he’d be a great judge of singing voices, but I would love to hear him interrupt Simon Cowell in mid-diatribe, then insist on having the last word on each performer because someone else got to go first.

– “Sesame Street” character. Don’t you think “Sesame Street” needs a lovable accountant-type figure to bring a sense of morality to young viewers? Like, say all the characters were going to have a surprise party for the letter “P,” and Mitt shows up at the last minute and tells them that, due to budget cuts, not only is the party off, but Elmo and Grover need to share a room and Oscar will have to move out?

– Starbucks barista. There’s something very Romney about being inside a Starbucks — the worldwide corporate giant posing as a mom-and-pop roaster. I think it would be great to have him overhear you complaining about how slow the line is moving, and hear him offer his five-point plan on how to get people their triple shot, no whip, extra dry latte up to five minutes faster without raising taxes.

– Running mate to Chris Christie. The only downfall to this is we would never see a debate between Romney and Joe Biden, which might be a good thing, since such a debate likely would be the mathematic equivalent of dividing by zero.

I’m even more irreverent on Twitter @joe_arney.

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NGKF chosen as exclusive leasing agent for former Pfizer HQ

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I don’t know how I feel about Mitt Romney as a president, but I do love him as a candidate, and I wish he could run every year.

Thanks to the neverending news cycle, which has stations running countdown clocks on the debate and includes CNN offering a live wire on undecided voters, we’ve been subjected to Romney winning the longest game of “Survivor” to get the nomination, and we’ve been treated to so many sound bytes from candidates that are so wooden, you expect them to start shedding leaves in the coming weeks. But Romney really has a gift for waking me from an apathetic haze (which is at least partly the fault of Irish whiskey, I suppose) and laughing along at the punch lines.

I really thought Romney hit a high-water mark in the first debate, when he said he’d fire Big Bird and essentially told Jim Lehrer he was next on the chopping block, even though Lehrer did more to help Romney in that debate than even the professorial, disengaged Barack Obama. But when a Mormon is onstage talking about binders full of women, you know you’ve struck paydirt.

So while I’m not excited about President Romney — although I’m about as thrilled with his opponent — I am really a fan of candidate Romney, especially since he’s reinvented himself so often that he’s on pace to have more patents than Thomas Edison by Election Day. But what would he do in the four — OK, two — years between presidential elections? Here are some ideas, Mitt, in case you lose:

– “X Factor” judge. Not that I really think he’d be a great judge of singing voices, but I would love to hear him interrupt Simon Cowell in mid-diatribe, then insist on having the last word on each performer because someone else got to go first.

– “Sesame Street” character. Don’t you think “Sesame Street” needs a lovable accountant-type figure to bring a sense of morality to young viewers? Like, say all the characters were going to have a surprise party for the letter “P,” and Mitt shows up at the last minute and tells them that, due to budget cuts, not only is the party off, but Elmo and Grover need to share a room and Oscar will have to move out?

– Starbucks barista. There’s something very Romney about being inside a Starbucks — the worldwide corporate giant posing as a mom-and-pop roaster. I think it would be great to have him overhear you complaining about how slow the line is moving, and hear him offer his five-point plan on how to get people their triple shot, no whip, extra dry latte up to five minutes faster without raising taxes.

– Running mate to Chris Christie. The only downfall to this is we would never see a debate between Romney and Joe Biden, which might be a good thing, since such a debate likely would be the mathematic equivalent of dividing by zero.

I’m even more irreverent on Twitter @joe_arney.

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NGKF chosen as exclusive leasing agent for former Pfizer HQ

By Eric Strauss
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By Emily Bader
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Princeton-based drug development company appoints chief scientific officer

By Emily Bader
January 29, 2015 02:45 PM

CONTINUE READING

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I don’t know how I feel about Mitt Romney as a president, but I do love him as a candidate, and I wish he could run every year.

Thanks to the neverending news cycle, which has stations running countdown clocks on the debate and includes CNN offering a live wire on undecided voters, we’ve been subjected to Romney winning the longest game of “Survivor” to get the nomination, and we’ve been treated to so many sound bytes from candidates that are so wooden, you expect them to start shedding leaves in the coming weeks. But Romney really has a gift for waking me from an apathetic haze (which is at least partly the fault of Irish whiskey, I suppose) and laughing along at the punch lines.

I really thought Romney hit a high-water mark in the first debate, when he said he’d fire Big Bird and essentially told Jim Lehrer he was next on the chopping block, even though Lehrer did more to help Romney in that debate than even the professorial, disengaged Barack Obama. But when a Mormon is onstage talking about binders full of women, you know you’ve struck paydirt.

So while I’m not excited about President Romney — although I’m about as thrilled with his opponent — I am really a fan of candidate Romney, especially since he’s reinvented himself so often that he’s on pace to have more patents than Thomas Edison by Election Day. But what would he do in the four — OK, two — years between presidential elections? Here are some ideas, Mitt, in case you lose:

– “X Factor” judge. Not that I really think he’d be a great judge of singing voices, but I would love to hear him interrupt Simon Cowell in mid-diatribe, then insist on having the last word on each performer because someone else got to go first.

– “Sesame Street” character. Don’t you think “Sesame Street” needs a lovable accountant-type figure to bring a sense of morality to young viewers? Like, say all the characters were going to have a surprise party for the letter “P,” and Mitt shows up at the last minute and tells them that, due to budget cuts, not only is the party off, but Elmo and Grover need to share a room and Oscar will have to move out?

– Starbucks barista. There’s something very Romney about being inside a Starbucks — the worldwide corporate giant posing as a mom-and-pop roaster. I think it would be great to have him overhear you complaining about how slow the line is moving, and hear him offer his five-point plan on how to get people their triple shot, no whip, extra dry latte up to five minutes faster without raising taxes.

– Running mate to Chris Christie. The only downfall to this is we would never see a debate between Romney and Joe Biden, which might be a good thing, since such a debate likely would be the mathematic equivalent of dividing by zero.

I’m even more irreverent on Twitter @joe_arney.

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NGKF chosen as exclusive leasing agent for former Pfizer HQ

By Eric Strauss
January 30, 2015 11:27 AM

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Hasbrouck Heights architecture firm secures 3-year NYC pact

By Emily Bader
January 30, 2015 12:21 PM

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Sitar Realty involved in several leases

By Eric Strauss
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CONTINUE READING

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By Eric Strauss
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Jersey City digital media company wraps up merger with advertising tech firm

By Eric Strauss
January 29, 2015 10:55 AM

CONTINUE READING

Logistics company signs lease for South Brunswick distribution center

By Eric Strauss
January 29, 2015 12:00 PM

CONTINUE READING

Princeton-based drug development company appoints chief scientific officer

By Emily Bader
January 29, 2015 02:45 PM

CONTINUE READING

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I don’t know how I feel about Mitt Romney as a president, but I do love him as a candidate, and I wish he could run every year.

Thanks to the neverending news cycle, which has stations running countdown clocks on the debate and includes CNN offering a live wire on undecided voters, we’ve been subjected to Romney winning the longest game of “Survivor” to get the nomination, and we’ve been treated to so many sound bytes from candidates that are so wooden, you expect them to start shedding leaves in the coming weeks. But Romney really has a gift for waking me from an apathetic haze (which is at least partly the fault of Irish whiskey, I suppose) and laughing along at the punch lines.

I really thought Romney hit a high-water mark in the first debate, when he said he’d fire Big Bird and essentially told Jim Lehrer he was next on the chopping block, even though Lehrer did more to help Romney in that debate than even the professorial, disengaged Barack Obama. But when a Mormon is onstage talking about binders full of women, you know you’ve struck paydirt.

So while I’m not excited about President Romney — although I’m about as thrilled with his opponent — I am really a fan of candidate Romney, especially since he’s reinvented himself so often that he’s on pace to have more patents than Thomas Edison by Election Day. But what would he do in the four — OK, two — years between presidential elections? Here are some ideas, Mitt, in case you lose:

– “X Factor” judge. Not that I really think he’d be a great judge of singing voices, but I would love to hear him interrupt Simon Cowell in mid-diatribe, then insist on having the last word on each performer because someone else got to go first.

– “Sesame Street” character. Don’t you think “Sesame Street” needs a lovable accountant-type figure to bring a sense of morality to young viewers? Like, say all the characters were going to have a surprise party for the letter “P,” and Mitt shows up at the last minute and tells them that, due to budget cuts, not only is the party off, but Elmo and Grover need to share a room and Oscar will have to move out?

– Starbucks barista. There’s something very Romney about being inside a Starbucks — the worldwide corporate giant posing as a mom-and-pop roaster. I think it would be great to have him overhear you complaining about how slow the line is moving, and hear him offer his five-point plan on how to get people their triple shot, no whip, extra dry latte up to five minutes faster without raising taxes.

– Running mate to Chris Christie. The only downfall to this is we would never see a debate between Romney and Joe Biden, which might be a good thing, since such a debate likely would be the mathematic equivalent of dividing by zero.

I’m even more irreverent on Twitter @joe_arney.

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NGKF chosen as exclusive leasing agent for former Pfizer HQ

By Eric Strauss
January 30, 2015 11:27 AM

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Hasbrouck Heights architecture firm secures 3-year NYC pact

By Emily Bader
January 30, 2015 12:21 PM

CONTINUE READING

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Sitar Realty involved in several leases

By Eric Strauss
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CONTINUE READING

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By Eric Strauss
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CONTINUE READING

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By Eric Strauss
January 29, 2015 10:55 AM

CONTINUE READING

Logistics company signs lease for South Brunswick distribution center

By Eric Strauss
January 29, 2015 12:00 PM

CONTINUE READING

Princeton-based drug development company appoints chief scientific officer

By Emily Bader
January 29, 2015 02:45 PM

CONTINUE READING

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I don’t know how I feel about Mitt Romney as a president, but I do love him as a candidate, and I wish he could run every year.

Thanks to the neverending news cycle, which has stations running countdown clocks on the debate and includes CNN offering a live wire on undecided voters, we’ve been subjected to Romney winning the longest game of “Survivor” to get the nomination, and we’ve been treated to so many sound bytes from candidates that are so wooden, you expect them to start shedding leaves in the coming weeks. But Romney really has a gift for waking me from an apathetic haze (which is at least partly the fault of Irish whiskey, I suppose) and laughing along at the punch lines.

I really thought Romney hit a high-water mark in the first debate, when he said he’d fire Big Bird and essentially told Jim Lehrer he was next on the chopping block, even though Lehrer did more to help Romney in that debate than even the professorial, disengaged Barack Obama. But when a Mormon is onstage talking about binders full of women, you know you’ve struck paydirt.

So while I’m not excited about President Romney — although I’m about as thrilled with his opponent — I am really a fan of candidate Romney, especially since he’s reinvented himself so often that he’s on pace to have more patents than Thomas Edison by Election Day. But what would he do in the four — OK, two — years between presidential elections? Here are some ideas, Mitt, in case you lose:

– “X Factor” judge. Not that I really think he’d be a great judge of singing voices, but I would love to hear him interrupt Simon Cowell in mid-diatribe, then insist on having the last word on each performer because someone else got to go first.

– “Sesame Street” character. Don’t you think “Sesame Street” needs a lovable accountant-type figure to bring a sense of morality to young viewers? Like, say all the characters were going to have a surprise party for the letter “P,” and Mitt shows up at the last minute and tells them that, due to budget cuts, not only is the party off, but Elmo and Grover need to share a room and Oscar will have to move out?

– Starbucks barista. There’s something very Romney about being inside a Starbucks — the worldwide corporate giant posing as a mom-and-pop roaster. I think it would be great to have him overhear you complaining about how slow the line is moving, and hear him offer his five-point plan on how to get people their triple shot, no whip, extra dry latte up to five minutes faster without raising taxes.

– Running mate to Chris Christie. The only downfall to this is we would never see a debate between Romney and Joe Biden, which might be a good thing, since such a debate likely would be the mathematic equivalent of dividing by zero.

I’m even more irreverent on Twitter @joe_arney.

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NGKF chosen as exclusive leasing agent for former Pfizer HQ

By Eric Strauss
January 30, 2015 11:27 AM

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Hasbrouck Heights architecture firm secures 3-year NYC pact

By Emily Bader
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CONTINUE READING

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Sitar Realty involved in several leases

By Eric Strauss
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CONTINUE READING

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CONTINUE READING

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By Eric Strauss
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CONTINUE READING

Princeton-based drug development company appoints chief scientific officer

By Emily Bader
January 29, 2015 02:45 PM

CONTINUE READING

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I don’t know how I feel about Mitt Romney as a president, but I do love him as a candidate, and I wish he could run every year.

Thanks to the neverending news cycle, which has stations running countdown clocks on the debate and includes CNN offering a live wire on undecided voters, we’ve been subjected to Romney winning the longest game of “Survivor” to get the nomination, and we’ve been treated to so many sound bytes from candidates that are so wooden, you expect them to start shedding leaves in the coming weeks. But Romney really has a gift for waking me from an apathetic haze (which is at least partly the fault of Irish whiskey, I suppose) and laughing along at the punch lines.

I really thought Romney hit a high-water mark in the first debate, when he said he’d fire Big Bird and essentially told Jim Lehrer he was next on the chopping block, even though Lehrer did more to help Romney in that debate than even the professorial, disengaged Barack Obama. But when a Mormon is onstage talking about binders full of women, you know you’ve struck paydirt.

So while I’m not excited about President Romney — although I’m about as thrilled with his opponent — I am really a fan of candidate Romney, especially since he’s reinvented himself so often that he’s on pace to have more patents than Thomas Edison by Election Day. But what would he do in the four — OK, two — years between presidential elections? Here are some ideas, Mitt, in case you lose:

– “X Factor” judge. Not that I really think he’d be a great judge of singing voices, but I would love to hear him interrupt Simon Cowell in mid-diatribe, then insist on having the last word on each performer because someone else got to go first.

– “Sesame Street” character. Don’t you think “Sesame Street” needs a lovable accountant-type figure to bring a sense of morality to young viewers? Like, say all the characters were going to have a surprise party for the letter “P,” and Mitt shows up at the last minute and tells them that, due to budget cuts, not only is the party off, but Elmo and Grover need to share a room and Oscar will have to move out?

– Starbucks barista. There’s something very Romney about being inside a Starbucks — the worldwide corporate giant posing as a mom-and-pop roaster. I think it would be great to have him overhear you complaining about how slow the line is moving, and hear him offer his five-point plan on how to get people their triple shot, no whip, extra dry latte up to five minutes faster without raising taxes.

– Running mate to Chris Christie. The only downfall to this is we would never see a debate between Romney and Joe Biden, which might be a good thing, since such a debate likely would be the mathematic equivalent of dividing by zero.

I’m even more irreverent on Twitter @joe_arney.

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NGKF chosen as exclusive leasing agent for former Pfizer HQ

By Eric Strauss
January 30, 2015 11:27 AM

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Hasbrouck Heights architecture firm secures 3-year NYC pact

By Emily Bader
January 30, 2015 12:21 PM

CONTINUE READING

advertisement

Sitar Realty involved in several leases

By Eric Strauss
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CONTINUE READING

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CONTINUE READING

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CONTINUE READING

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By Eric Strauss
January 29, 2015 12:00 PM

CONTINUE READING

Princeton-based drug development company appoints chief scientific officer

By Emily Bader
January 29, 2015 02:45 PM

CONTINUE READING

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I don’t know how I feel about Mitt Romney as a president, but I do love him as a candidate, and I wish he could run every year.

Thanks to the neverending news cycle, which has stations running countdown clocks on the debate and includes CNN offering a live wire on undecided voters, we’ve been subjected to Romney winning the longest game of “Survivor” to get the nomination, and we’ve been treated to so many sound bytes from candidates that are so wooden, you expect them to start shedding leaves in the coming weeks. But Romney really has a gift for waking me from an apathetic haze (which is at least partly the fault of Irish whiskey, I suppose) and laughing along at the punch lines.

I really thought Romney hit a high-water mark in the first debate, when he said he’d fire Big Bird and essentially told Jim Lehrer he was next on the chopping block, even though Lehrer did more to help Romney in that debate than even the professorial, disengaged Barack Obama. But when a Mormon is onstage talking about binders full of women, you know you’ve struck paydirt.

So while I’m not excited about President Romney — although I’m about as thrilled with his opponent — I am really a fan of candidate Romney, especially since he’s reinvented himself so often that he’s on pace to have more patents than Thomas Edison by Election Day. But what would he do in the four — OK, two — years between presidential elections? Here are some ideas, Mitt, in case you lose:

– “X Factor” judge. Not that I really think he’d be a great judge of singing voices, but I would love to hear him interrupt Simon Cowell in mid-diatribe, then insist on having the last word on each performer because someone else got to go first.

– “Sesame Street” character. Don’t you think “Sesame Street” needs a lovable accountant-type figure to bring a sense of morality to young viewers? Like, say all the characters were going to have a surprise party for the letter “P,” and Mitt shows up at the last minute and tells them that, due to budget cuts, not only is the party off, but Elmo and Grover need to share a room and Oscar will have to move out?

– Starbucks barista. There’s something very Romney about being inside a Starbucks — the worldwide corporate giant posing as a mom-and-pop roaster. I think it would be great to have him overhear you complaining about how slow the line is moving, and hear him offer his five-point plan on how to get people their triple shot, no whip, extra dry latte up to five minutes faster without raising taxes.

– Running mate to Chris Christie. The only downfall to this is we would never see a debate between Romney and Joe Biden, which might be a good thing, since such a debate likely would be the mathematic equivalent of dividing by zero.

I’m even more irreverent on Twitter @joe_arney.

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Latest News

NGKF chosen as exclusive leasing agent for former Pfizer HQ

By Eric Strauss
January 30, 2015 11:27 AM

CONTINUE READING

Hasbrouck Heights architecture firm secures 3-year NYC pact

By Emily Bader
January 30, 2015 12:21 PM

CONTINUE READING

advertisement

Sitar Realty involved in several leases

By Eric Strauss
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CONTINUE READING

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By Eric Strauss
January 29, 2015 03:22 PM

CONTINUE READING

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By Eric Strauss
January 29, 2015 10:55 AM

CONTINUE READING

Logistics company signs lease for South Brunswick distribution center

By Eric Strauss
January 29, 2015 12:00 PM

CONTINUE READING

Princeton-based drug development company appoints chief scientific officer

By Emily Bader
January 29, 2015 02:45 PM

CONTINUE READING

advertisement

I don’t know how I feel about Mitt Romney as a president, but I do love him as a candidate, and I wish he could run every year.

Thanks to the neverending news cycle, which has stations running countdown clocks on the debate and includes CNN offering a live wire on undecided voters, we’ve been subjected to Romney winning the longest game of “Survivor” to get the nomination, and we’ve been treated to so many sound bytes from candidates that are so wooden, you expect them to start shedding leaves in the coming weeks. But Romney really has a gift for waking me from an apathetic haze (which is at least partly the fault of Irish whiskey, I suppose) and laughing along at the punch lines.

I really thought Romney hit a high-water mark in the first debate, when he said he’d fire Big Bird and essentially told Jim Lehrer he was next on the chopping block, even though Lehrer did more to help Romney in that debate than even the professorial, disengaged Barack Obama. But when a Mormon is onstage talking about binders full of women, you know you’ve struck paydirt.

So while I’m not excited about President Romney — although I’m about as thrilled with his opponent — I am really a fan of candidate Romney, especially since he’s reinvented himself so often that he’s on pace to have more patents than Thomas Edison by Election Day. But what would he do in the four — OK, two — years between presidential elections? Here are some ideas, Mitt, in case you lose:

– “X Factor” judge. Not that I really think he’d be a great judge of singing voices, but I would love to hear him interrupt Simon Cowell in mid-diatribe, then insist on having the last word on each performer because someone else got to go first.

– “Sesame Street” character. Don’t you think “Sesame Street” needs a lovable accountant-type figure to bring a sense of morality to young viewers? Like, say all the characters were going to have a surprise party for the letter “P,” and Mitt shows up at the last minute and tells them that, due to budget cuts, not only is the party off, but Elmo and Grover need to share a room and Oscar will have to move out?

– Starbucks barista. There’s something very Romney about being inside a Starbucks — the worldwide corporate giant posing as a mom-and-pop roaster. I think it would be great to have him overhear you complaining about how slow the line is moving, and hear him offer his five-point plan on how to get people their triple shot, no whip, extra dry latte up to five minutes faster without raising taxes.

– Running mate to Chris Christie. The only downfall to this is we would never see a debate between Romney and Joe Biden, which might be a good thing, since such a debate likely would be the mathematic equivalent of dividing by zero.

I’m even more irreverent on Twitter @joe_arney.

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Latest News

NGKF chosen as exclusive leasing agent for former Pfizer HQ

By Eric Strauss
January 30, 2015 11:27 AM

CONTINUE READING

Hasbrouck Heights architecture firm secures 3-year NYC pact

By Emily Bader
January 30, 2015 12:21 PM

CONTINUE READING

advertisement

Sitar Realty involved in several leases

By Eric Strauss
January 29, 2015 03:34 PM

CONTINUE READING

KeyBank adds execs to northern N.J. team

By Eric Strauss
January 29, 2015 03:22 PM

CONTINUE READING

Jersey City digital media company wraps up merger with advertising tech firm

By Eric Strauss
January 29, 2015 10:55 AM

CONTINUE READING

Logistics company signs lease for South Brunswick distribution center

By Eric Strauss
January 29, 2015 12:00 PM

CONTINUE READING

Princeton-based drug development company appoints chief scientific officer

By Emily Bader
January 29, 2015 02:45 PM

CONTINUE READING

advertisement

I don’t know how I feel about Mitt Romney as a president, but I do love him as a candidate, and I wish he could run every year.

Thanks to the neverending news cycle, which has stations running countdown clocks on the debate and includes CNN offering a live wire on undecided voters, we’ve been subjected to Romney winning the longest game of “Survivor” to get the nomination, and we’ve been treated to so many sound bytes from candidates that are so wooden, you expect them to start shedding leaves in the coming weeks. But Romney really has a gift for waking me from an apathetic haze (which is at least partly the fault of Irish whiskey, I suppose) and laughing along at the punch lines.

I really thought Romney hit a high-water mark in the first debate, when he said he’d fire Big Bird and essentially told Jim Lehrer he was next on the chopping block, even though Lehrer did more to help Romney in that debate than even the professorial, disengaged Barack Obama. But when a Mormon is onstage talking about binders full of women, you know you’ve struck paydirt.

So while I’m not excited about President Romney — although I’m about as thrilled with his opponent — I am really a fan of candidate Romney, especially since he’s reinvented himself so often that he’s on pace to have more patents than Thomas Edison by Election Day. But what would he do in the four — OK, two — years between presidential elections? Here are some ideas, Mitt, in case you lose:

– “X Factor” judge. Not that I really think he’d be a great judge of singing voices, but I would love to hear him interrupt Simon Cowell in mid-diatribe, then insist on having the last word on each performer because someone else got to go first.

– “Sesame Street” character. Don’t you think “Sesame Street” needs a lovable accountant-type figure to bring a sense of morality to young viewers? Like, say all the characters were going to have a surprise party for the letter “P,” and Mitt shows up at the last minute and tells them that, due to budget cuts, not only is the party off, but Elmo and Grover need to share a room and Oscar will have to move out?

– Starbucks barista. There’s something very Romney about being inside a Starbucks — the worldwide corporate giant posing as a mom-and-pop roaster. I think it would be great to have him overhear you complaining about how slow the line is moving, and hear him offer his five-point plan on how to get people their triple shot, no whip, extra dry latte up to five minutes faster without raising taxes.

– Running mate to Chris Christie. The only downfall to this is we would never see a debate between Romney and Joe Biden, which might be a good thing, since such a debate likely would be the mathematic equivalent of dividing by zero.

I’m even more irreverent on Twitter @joe_arney.

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NGKF chosen as exclusive leasing agent for former Pfizer HQ

By Eric Strauss
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I don’t know how I feel about Mitt Romney as a president, but I do love him as a candidate, and I wish he could run every year.

Thanks to the neverending news cycle, which has stations running countdown clocks on the debate and includes CNN offering a live wire on undecided voters, we’ve been subjected to Romney winning the longest game of “Survivor” to get the nomination, and we’ve been treated to so many sound bytes from candidates that are so wooden, you expect them to start shedding leaves in the coming weeks. But Romney really has a gift for waking me from an apathetic haze (which is at least partly the fault of Irish whiskey, I suppose) and laughing along at the punch lines.

I really thought Romney hit a high-water mark in the first debate, when he said he’d fire Big Bird and essentially told Jim Lehrer he was next on the chopping block, even though Lehrer did more to help Romney in that debate than even the professorial, disengaged Barack Obama. But when a Mormon is onstage talking about binders full of women, you know you’ve struck paydirt.

So while I’m not excited about President Romney — although I’m about as thrilled with his opponent — I am really a fan of candidate Romney, especially since he’s reinvented himself so often that he’s on pace to have more patents than Thomas Edison by Election Day. But what would he do in the four — OK, two — years between presidential elections? Here are some ideas, Mitt, in case you lose:

– “X Factor” judge. Not that I really think he’d be a great judge of singing voices, but I would love to hear him interrupt Simon Cowell in mid-diatribe, then insist on having the last word on each performer because someone else got to go first.

– “Sesame Street” character. Don’t you think “Sesame Street” needs a lovable accountant-type figure to bring a sense of morality to young viewers? Like, say all the characters were going to have a surprise party for the letter “P,” and Mitt shows up at the last minute and tells them that, due to budget cuts, not only is the party off, but Elmo and Grover need to share a room and Oscar will have to move out?

– Starbucks barista. There’s something very Romney about being inside a Starbucks — the worldwide corporate giant posing as a mom-and-pop roaster. I think it would be great to have him overhear you complaining about how slow the line is moving, and hear him offer his five-point plan on how to get people their triple shot, no whip, extra dry latte up to five minutes faster without raising taxes.

– Running mate to Chris Christie. The only downfall to this is we would never see a debate between Romney and Joe Biden, which might be a good thing, since such a debate likely would be the mathematic equivalent of dividing by zero.

I’m even more irreverent on Twitter @joe_arney.

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NGKF chosen as exclusive leasing agent for former Pfizer HQ

By Eric Strauss
January 30, 2015 11:27 AM

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By Emily Bader
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CONTINUE READING

Princeton-based drug development company appoints chief scientific officer

By Emily Bader
January 29, 2015 02:45 PM

CONTINUE READING

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I don’t know how I feel about Mitt Romney as a president, but I do love him as a candidate, and I wish he could run every year.

Thanks to the neverending news cycle, which has stations running countdown clocks on the debate and includes CNN offering a live wire on undecided voters, we’ve been subjected to Romney winning the longest game of “Survivor” to get the nomination, and we’ve been treated to so many sound bytes from candidates that are so wooden, you expect them to start shedding leaves in the coming weeks. But Romney really has a gift for waking me from an apathetic haze (which is at least partly the fault of Irish whiskey, I suppose) and laughing along at the punch lines.

I really thought Romney hit a high-water mark in the first debate, when he said he’d fire Big Bird and essentially told Jim Lehrer he was next on the chopping block, even though Lehrer did more to help Romney in that debate than even the professorial, disengaged Barack Obama. But when a Mormon is onstage talking about binders full of women, you know you’ve struck paydirt.

So while I’m not excited about President Romney — although I’m about as thrilled with his opponent — I am really a fan of candidate Romney, especially since he’s reinvented himself so often that he’s on pace to have more patents than Thomas Edison by Election Day. But what would he do in the four — OK, two — years between presidential elections? Here are some ideas, Mitt, in case you lose:

– “X Factor” judge. Not that I really think he’d be a great judge of singing voices, but I would love to hear him interrupt Simon Cowell in mid-diatribe, then insist on having the last word on each performer because someone else got to go first.

– “Sesame Street” character. Don’t you think “Sesame Street” needs a lovable accountant-type figure to bring a sense of morality to young viewers? Like, say all the characters were going to have a surprise party for the letter “P,” and Mitt shows up at the last minute and tells them that, due to budget cuts, not only is the party off, but Elmo and Grover need to share a room and Oscar will have to move out?

– Starbucks barista. There’s something very Romney about being inside a Starbucks — the worldwide corporate giant posing as a mom-and-pop roaster. I think it would be great to have him overhear you complaining about how slow the line is moving, and hear him offer his five-point plan on how to get people their triple shot, no whip, extra dry latte up to five minutes faster without raising taxes.

– Running mate to Chris Christie. The only downfall to this is we would never see a debate between Romney and Joe Biden, which might be a good thing, since such a debate likely would be the mathematic equivalent of dividing by zero.

I’m even more irreverent on Twitter @joe_arney.

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NGKF chosen as exclusive leasing agent for former Pfizer HQ

By Eric Strauss
January 30, 2015 11:27 AM

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Hasbrouck Heights architecture firm secures 3-year NYC pact

By Emily Bader
January 30, 2015 12:21 PM

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By Eric Strauss
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CONTINUE READING

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By Eric Strauss
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By Eric Strauss
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CONTINUE READING

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By Eric Strauss
January 29, 2015 12:00 PM

CONTINUE READING

Princeton-based drug development company appoints chief scientific officer

By Emily Bader
January 29, 2015 02:45 PM

CONTINUE READING

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I don’t know how I feel about Mitt Romney as a president, but I do love him as a candidate, and I wish he could run every year.

Thanks to the neverending news cycle, which has stations running countdown clocks on the debate and includes CNN offering a live wire on undecided voters, we’ve been subjected to Romney winning the longest game of “Survivor” to get the nomination, and we’ve been treated to so many sound bytes from candidates that are so wooden, you expect them to start shedding leaves in the coming weeks. But Romney really has a gift for waking me from an apathetic haze (which is at least partly the fault of Irish whiskey, I suppose) and laughing along at the punch lines.

I really thought Romney hit a high-water mark in the first debate, when he said he’d fire Big Bird and essentially told Jim Lehrer he was next on the chopping block, even though Lehrer did more to help Romney in that debate than even the professorial, disengaged Barack Obama. But when a Mormon is onstage talking about binders full of women, you know you’ve struck paydirt.

So while I’m not excited about President Romney — although I’m about as thrilled with his opponent — I am really a fan of candidate Romney, especially since he’s reinvented himself so often that he’s on pace to have more patents than Thomas Edison by Election Day. But what would he do in the four — OK, two — years between presidential elections? Here are some ideas, Mitt, in case you lose:

– “X Factor” judge. Not that I really think he’d be a great judge of singing voices, but I would love to hear him interrupt Simon Cowell in mid-diatribe, then insist on having the last word on each performer because someone else got to go first.

– “Sesame Street” character. Don’t you think “Sesame Street” needs a lovable accountant-type figure to bring a sense of morality to young viewers? Like, say all the characters were going to have a surprise party for the letter “P,” and Mitt shows up at the last minute and tells them that, due to budget cuts, not only is the party off, but Elmo and Grover need to share a room and Oscar will have to move out?

– Starbucks barista. There’s something very Romney about being inside a Starbucks — the worldwide corporate giant posing as a mom-and-pop roaster. I think it would be great to have him overhear you complaining about how slow the line is moving, and hear him offer his five-point plan on how to get people their triple shot, no whip, extra dry latte up to five minutes faster without raising taxes.

– Running mate to Chris Christie. The only downfall to this is we would never see a debate between Romney and Joe Biden, which might be a good thing, since such a debate likely would be the mathematic equivalent of dividing by zero.

I’m even more irreverent on Twitter @joe_arney.

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NGKF chosen as exclusive leasing agent for former Pfizer HQ

By Eric Strauss
January 30, 2015 11:27 AM

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Hasbrouck Heights architecture firm secures 3-year NYC pact

By Emily Bader
January 30, 2015 12:21 PM

CONTINUE READING

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Sitar Realty involved in several leases

By Eric Strauss
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CONTINUE READING

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By Eric Strauss
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By Eric Strauss
January 29, 2015 10:55 AM

CONTINUE READING

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By Eric Strauss
January 29, 2015 12:00 PM

CONTINUE READING

Princeton-based drug development company appoints chief scientific officer

By Emily Bader
January 29, 2015 02:45 PM

CONTINUE READING

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I don’t know how I feel about Mitt Romney as a president, but I do love him as a candidate, and I wish he could run every year.

Thanks to the neverending news cycle, which has stations running countdown clocks on the debate and includes CNN offering a live wire on undecided voters, we’ve been subjected to Romney winning the longest game of “Survivor” to get the nomination, and we’ve been treated to so many sound bytes from candidates that are so wooden, you expect them to start shedding leaves in the coming weeks. But Romney really has a gift for waking me from an apathetic haze (which is at least partly the fault of Irish whiskey, I suppose) and laughing along at the punch lines.

I really thought Romney hit a high-water mark in the first debate, when he said he’d fire Big Bird and essentially told Jim Lehrer he was next on the chopping block, even though Lehrer did more to help Romney in that debate than even the professorial, disengaged Barack Obama. But when a Mormon is onstage talking about binders full of women, you know you’ve struck paydirt.

So while I’m not excited about President Romney — although I’m about as thrilled with his opponent — I am really a fan of candidate Romney, especially since he’s reinvented himself so often that he’s on pace to have more patents than Thomas Edison by Election Day. But what would he do in the four — OK, two — years between presidential elections? Here are some ideas, Mitt, in case you lose:

– “X Factor” judge. Not that I really think he’d be a great judge of singing voices, but I would love to hear him interrupt Simon Cowell in mid-diatribe, then insist on having the last word on each performer because someone else got to go first.

– “Sesame Street” character. Don’t you think “Sesame Street” needs a lovable accountant-type figure to bring a sense of morality to young viewers? Like, say all the characters were going to have a surprise party for the letter “P,” and Mitt shows up at the last minute and tells them that, due to budget cuts, not only is the party off, but Elmo and Grover need to share a room and Oscar will have to move out?

– Starbucks barista. There’s something very Romney about being inside a Starbucks — the worldwide corporate giant posing as a mom-and-pop roaster. I think it would be great to have him overhear you complaining about how slow the line is moving, and hear him offer his five-point plan on how to get people their triple shot, no whip, extra dry latte up to five minutes faster without raising taxes.

– Running mate to Chris Christie. The only downfall to this is we would never see a debate between Romney and Joe Biden, which might be a good thing, since such a debate likely would be the mathematic equivalent of dividing by zero.

I’m even more irreverent on Twitter @joe_arney.

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NGKF chosen as exclusive leasing agent for former Pfizer HQ

By Eric Strauss
January 30, 2015 11:27 AM

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Hasbrouck Heights architecture firm secures 3-year NYC pact

By Emily Bader
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CONTINUE READING

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Sitar Realty involved in several leases

By Eric Strauss
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CONTINUE READING

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CONTINUE READING

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By Eric Strauss
January 29, 2015 12:00 PM

CONTINUE READING

Princeton-based drug development company appoints chief scientific officer

By Emily Bader
January 29, 2015 02:45 PM

CONTINUE READING

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I don’t know how I feel about Mitt Romney as a president, but I do love him as a candidate, and I wish he could run every year.

Thanks to the neverending news cycle, which has stations running countdown clocks on the debate and includes CNN offering a live wire on undecided voters, we’ve been subjected to Romney winning the longest game of “Survivor” to get the nomination, and we’ve been treated to so many sound bytes from candidates that are so wooden, you expect them to start shedding leaves in the coming weeks. But Romney really has a gift for waking me from an apathetic haze (which is at least partly the fault of Irish whiskey, I suppose) and laughing along at the punch lines.

I really thought Romney hit a high-water mark in the first debate, when he said he’d fire Big Bird and essentially told Jim Lehrer he was next on the chopping block, even though Lehrer did more to help Romney in that debate than even the professorial, disengaged Barack Obama. But when a Mormon is onstage talking about binders full of women, you know you’ve struck paydirt.

So while I’m not excited about President Romney — although I’m about as thrilled with his opponent — I am really a fan of candidate Romney, especially since he’s reinvented himself so often that he’s on pace to have more patents than Thomas Edison by Election Day. But what would he do in the four — OK, two — years between presidential elections? Here are some ideas, Mitt, in case you lose:

– “X Factor” judge. Not that I really think he’d be a great judge of singing voices, but I would love to hear him interrupt Simon Cowell in mid-diatribe, then insist on having the last word on each performer because someone else got to go first.

– “Sesame Street” character. Don’t you think “Sesame Street” needs a lovable accountant-type figure to bring a sense of morality to young viewers? Like, say all the characters were going to have a surprise party for the letter “P,” and Mitt shows up at the last minute and tells them that, due to budget cuts, not only is the party off, but Elmo and Grover need to share a room and Oscar will have to move out?

– Starbucks barista. There’s something very Romney about being inside a Starbucks — the worldwide corporate giant posing as a mom-and-pop roaster. I think it would be great to have him overhear you complaining about how slow the line is moving, and hear him offer his five-point plan on how to get people their triple shot, no whip, extra dry latte up to five minutes faster without raising taxes.

– Running mate to Chris Christie. The only downfall to this is we would never see a debate between Romney and Joe Biden, which might be a good thing, since such a debate likely would be the mathematic equivalent of dividing by zero.

I’m even more irreverent on Twitter @joe_arney.

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NGKF chosen as exclusive leasing agent for former Pfizer HQ

By Eric Strauss
January 30, 2015 11:27 AM

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Hasbrouck Heights architecture firm secures 3-year NYC pact

By Emily Bader
January 30, 2015 12:21 PM

CONTINUE READING

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Sitar Realty involved in several leases

By Eric Strauss
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CONTINUE READING

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CONTINUE READING

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By Eric Strauss
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CONTINUE READING

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By Eric Strauss
January 29, 2015 12:00 PM

CONTINUE READING

Princeton-based drug development company appoints chief scientific officer

By Emily Bader
January 29, 2015 02:45 PM

CONTINUE READING

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I don’t know how I feel about Mitt Romney as a president, but I do love him as a candidate, and I wish he could run every year.

Thanks to the neverending news cycle, which has stations running countdown clocks on the debate and includes CNN offering a live wire on undecided voters, we’ve been subjected to Romney winning the longest game of “Survivor” to get the nomination, and we’ve been treated to so many sound bytes from candidates that are so wooden, you expect them to start shedding leaves in the coming weeks. But Romney really has a gift for waking me from an apathetic haze (which is at least partly the fault of Irish whiskey, I suppose) and laughing along at the punch lines.

I really thought Romney hit a high-water mark in the first debate, when he said he’d fire Big Bird and essentially told Jim Lehrer he was next on the chopping block, even though Lehrer did more to help Romney in that debate than even the professorial, disengaged Barack Obama. But when a Mormon is onstage talking about binders full of women, you know you’ve struck paydirt.

So while I’m not excited about President Romney — although I’m about as thrilled with his opponent — I am really a fan of candidate Romney, especially since he’s reinvented himself so often that he’s on pace to have more patents than Thomas Edison by Election Day. But what would he do in the four — OK, two — years between presidential elections? Here are some ideas, Mitt, in case you lose:

– “X Factor” judge. Not that I really think he’d be a great judge of singing voices, but I would love to hear him interrupt Simon Cowell in mid-diatribe, then insist on having the last word on each performer because someone else got to go first.

– “Sesame Street” character. Don’t you think “Sesame Street” needs a lovable accountant-type figure to bring a sense of morality to young viewers? Like, say all the characters were going to have a surprise party for the letter “P,” and Mitt shows up at the last minute and tells them that, due to budget cuts, not only is the party off, but Elmo and Grover need to share a room and Oscar will have to move out?

– Starbucks barista. There’s something very Romney about being inside a Starbucks — the worldwide corporate giant posing as a mom-and-pop roaster. I think it would be great to have him overhear you complaining about how slow the line is moving, and hear him offer his five-point plan on how to get people their triple shot, no whip, extra dry latte up to five minutes faster without raising taxes.

– Running mate to Chris Christie. The only downfall to this is we would never see a debate between Romney and Joe Biden, which might be a good thing, since such a debate likely would be the mathematic equivalent of dividing by zero.

I’m even more irreverent on Twitter @joe_arney.

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By Eric Strauss
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CONTINUE READING

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I don’t know how I feel about Mitt Romney as a president, but I do love him as a candidate, and I wish he could run every year.

Thanks to the neverending news cycle, which has stations running countdown clocks on the debate and includes CNN offering a live wire on undecided voters, we’ve been subjected to Romney winning the longest game of “Survivor” to get the nomination, and we’ve been treated to so many sound bytes from candidates that are so wooden, you expect them to start shedding leaves in the coming weeks. But Romney really has a gift for waking me from an apathetic haze (which is at least partly the fault of Irish whiskey, I suppose) and laughing along at the punch lines.

I really thought Romney hit a high-water mark in the first debate, when he said he’d fire Big Bird and essentially told Jim Lehrer he was next on the chopping block, even though Lehrer did more to help Romney in that debate than even the professorial, disengaged Barack Obama. But when a Mormon is onstage talking about binders full of women, you know you’ve struck paydirt.

So while I’m not excited about President Romney — although I’m about as thrilled with his opponent — I am really a fan of candidate Romney, especially since he’s reinvented himself so often that he’s on pace to have more patents than Thomas Edison by Election Day. But what would he do in the four — OK, two — years between presidential elections? Here are some ideas, Mitt, in case you lose:

– “X Factor” judge. Not that I really think he’d be a great judge of singing voices, but I would love to hear him interrupt Simon Cowell in mid-diatribe, then insist on having the last word on each performer because someone else got to go first.

– “Sesame Street” character. Don’t you think “Sesame Street” needs a lovable accountant-type figure to bring a sense of morality to young viewers? Like, say all the characters were going to have a surprise party for the letter “P,” and Mitt shows up at the last minute and tells them that, due to budget cuts, not only is the party off, but Elmo and Grover need to share a room and Oscar will have to move out?

– Starbucks barista. There’s something very Romney about being inside a Starbucks — the worldwide corporate giant posing as a mom-and-pop roaster. I think it would be great to have him overhear you complaining about how slow the line is moving, and hear him offer his five-point plan on how to get people their triple shot, no whip, extra dry latte up to five minutes faster without raising taxes.

– Running mate to Chris Christie. The only downfall to this is we would never see a debate between Romney and Joe Biden, which might be a good thing, since such a debate likely would be the mathematic equivalent of dividing by zero.

I’m even more irreverent on Twitter @joe_arney.

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NJR unit builds 16 megawatts' worth of solar installations

By Eric Strauss
January 30, 2015 04:20 PM

CONTINUE READING

NGKF chosen as exclusive leasing agent for former Pfizer HQ

By Eric Strauss
January 30, 2015 11:27 AM

CONTINUE READING

advertisement

Hasbrouck Heights architecture firm secures 3-year NYC pact

By Emily Bader
January 30, 2015 12:21 PM

CONTINUE READING

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By Eric Strauss
January 29, 2015 03:34 PM

CONTINUE READING

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By Eric Strauss
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CONTINUE READING

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By Eric Strauss
January 29, 2015 10:55 AM

CONTINUE READING

Logistics company signs lease for South Brunswick distribution center

By Eric Strauss
January 29, 2015 12:00 PM

CONTINUE READING

advertisement

I don’t know how I feel about Mitt Romney as a president, but I do love him as a candidate, and I wish he could run every year.

Thanks to the neverending news cycle, which has stations running countdown clocks on the debate and includes CNN offering a live wire on undecided voters, we’ve been subjected to Romney winning the longest game of “Survivor” to get the nomination, and we’ve been treated to so many sound bytes from candidates that are so wooden, you expect them to start shedding leaves in the coming weeks. But Romney really has a gift for waking me from an apathetic haze (which is at least partly the fault of Irish whiskey, I suppose) and laughing along at the punch lines.

I really thought Romney hit a high-water mark in the first debate, when he said he’d fire Big Bird and essentially told Jim Lehrer he was next on the chopping block, even though Lehrer did more to help Romney in that debate than even the professorial, disengaged Barack Obama. But when a Mormon is onstage talking about binders full of women, you know you’ve struck paydirt.

So while I’m not excited about President Romney — although I’m about as thrilled with his opponent — I am really a fan of candidate Romney, especially since he’s reinvented himself so often that he’s on pace to have more patents than Thomas Edison by Election Day. But what would he do in the four — OK, two — years between presidential elections? Here are some ideas, Mitt, in case you lose:

– “X Factor” judge. Not that I really think he’d be a great judge of singing voices, but I would love to hear him interrupt Simon Cowell in mid-diatribe, then insist on having the last word on each performer because someone else got to go first.

– “Sesame Street” character. Don’t you think “Sesame Street” needs a lovable accountant-type figure to bring a sense of morality to young viewers? Like, say all the characters were going to have a surprise party for the letter “P,” and Mitt shows up at the last minute and tells them that, due to budget cuts, not only is the party off, but Elmo and Grover need to share a room and Oscar will have to move out?

– Starbucks barista. There’s something very Romney about being inside a Starbucks — the worldwide corporate giant posing as a mom-and-pop roaster. I think it would be great to have him overhear you complaining about how slow the line is moving, and hear him offer his five-point plan on how to get people their triple shot, no whip, extra dry latte up to five minutes faster without raising taxes.

– Running mate to Chris Christie. The only downfall to this is we would never see a debate between Romney and Joe Biden, which might be a good thing, since such a debate likely would be the mathematic equivalent of dividing by zero.

I’m even more irreverent on Twitter @joe_arney.

Share This Story On:

Binders full of women and other reasons to keep Mitt around

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I don’t know how I feel about Mitt Romney as a president, but I do love him as a candidate, and I wish he could run every year.

Thanks to the neverending news cycle, which has stations running countdown clocks on the debate and includes CNN offering a live wire on undecided voters, we’ve been subjected to Romney winning the longest game of “Survivor” to get the nomination, and we’ve been treated to so many sound bytes from candidates that are so wooden, you expect them to start shedding leaves in the coming weeks. But Romney really has a gift for waking me from an apathetic haze (which is at least partly the fault of Irish whiskey, I suppose) and laughing along at the punch lines.

I really thought Romney hit a high-water mark in the first debate, when he said he’d fire Big Bird and essentially told Jim Lehrer he was next on the chopping block, even though Lehrer did more to help Romney in that debate than even the professorial, disengaged Barack Obama. But when a Mormon is onstage talking about binders full of women, you know you’ve struck paydirt.

So while I’m not excited about President Romney — although I’m about as thrilled with his opponent — I am really a fan of candidate Romney, especially since he’s reinvented himself so often that he’s on pace to have more patents than Thomas Edison by Election Day. But what would he do in the four — OK, two — years between presidential elections? Here are some ideas, Mitt, in case you lose:

– “X Factor” judge. Not that I really think he’d be a great judge of singing voices, but I would love to hear him interrupt Simon Cowell in mid-diatribe, then insist on having the last word on each performer because someone else got to go first.

– “Sesame Street” character. Don’t you think “Sesame Street” needs a lovable accountant-type figure to bring a sense of morality to young viewers? Like, say all the characters were going to have a surprise party for the letter “P,” and Mitt shows up at the last minute and tells them that, due to budget cuts, not only is the party off, but Elmo and Grover need to share a room and Oscar will have to move out?

– Starbucks barista. There’s something very Romney about being inside a Starbucks — the worldwide corporate giant posing as a mom-and-pop roaster. I think it would be great to have him overhear you complaining about how slow the line is moving, and hear him offer his five-point plan on how to get people their triple shot, no whip, extra dry latte up to five minutes faster without raising taxes.

– Running mate to Chris Christie. The only downfall to this is we would never see a debate between Romney and Joe Biden, which might be a good thing, since such a debate likely would be the mathematic equivalent of dividing by zero.

I’m even more irreverent on Twitter @joe_arney.

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Binders full of women and other reasons to keep Mitt around

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I don’t know how I feel about Mitt Romney as a president, but I do love him as a candidate, and I wish he could run every year.

Thanks to the neverending news cycle, which has stations running countdown clocks on the debate and includes CNN offering a live wire on undecided voters, we’ve been subjected to Romney winning the longest game of “Survivor” to get the nomination, and we’ve been treated to so many sound bytes from candidates that are so wooden, you expect them to start shedding leaves in the coming weeks. But Romney really has a gift for waking me from an apathetic haze (which is at least partly the fault of Irish whiskey, I suppose) and laughing along at the punch lines.

I really thought Romney hit a high-water mark in the first debate, when he said he’d fire Big Bird and essentially told Jim Lehrer he was next on the chopping block, even though Lehrer did more to help Romney in that debate than even the professorial, disengaged Barack Obama. But when a Mormon is onstage talking about binders full of women, you know you’ve struck paydirt.

So while I’m not excited about President Romney — although I’m about as thrilled with his opponent — I am really a fan of candidate Romney, especially since he’s reinvented himself so often that he’s on pace to have more patents than Thomas Edison by Election Day. But what would he do in the four — OK, two — years between presidential elections? Here are some ideas, Mitt, in case you lose:

– “X Factor” judge. Not that I really think he’d be a great judge of singing voices, but I would love to hear him interrupt Simon Cowell in mid-diatribe, then insist on having the last word on each performer because someone else got to go first.

– “Sesame Street” character. Don’t you think “Sesame Street” needs a lovable accountant-type figure to bring a sense of morality to young viewers? Like, say all the characters were going to have a surprise party for the letter “P,” and Mitt shows up at the last minute and tells them that, due to budget cuts, not only is the party off, but Elmo and Grover need to share a room and Oscar will have to move out?

– Starbucks barista. There’s something very Romney about being inside a Starbucks — the worldwide corporate giant posing as a mom-and-pop roaster. I think it would be great to have him overhear you complaining about how slow the line is moving, and hear him offer his five-point plan on how to get people their triple shot, no whip, extra dry latte up to five minutes faster without raising taxes.

– Running mate to Chris Christie. The only downfall to this is we would never see a debate between Romney and Joe Biden, which might be a good thing, since such a debate likely would be the mathematic equivalent of dividing by zero.

I’m even more irreverent on Twitter @joe_arney.

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